[PanicZone] Re: Hello
Hi Jackie,
First let me say that I've had panic disorder since a child before they knew what to call it. I'm an RN who had to go on disability in 1995 due to panic. I also lost my husband in 2006 from suicide and I know what you are going through. I'm thinking that your panic might just be part of the grief cycle. It took me 5 yrs. before I felt like I had finally come back to life after his death. You are just beginning the walk. There is something very scary about all of a sudden being alone and totally responsible for yourself. Waking up to an empty house or at night sleeping in an empty bed is hard to get used to so be easy with yourself. Don't label yourself with panic disorder just yet. No self fulfilling prophesies, ok? I'm on Cymbalta & Xanax which controls my panic. I've been on every med. and seen lots of therapists but this is the first time my meds. have helped completely. I think Xanax is the best but it is hard to get Drs. to prescribe it. I take 1 mg
3 times a day if I need to. Therapy was useless for me. I really think you would do better not worrying about the anxiety/panic and just get through the grief. I used to check my pulse constantly and my Dr. told me to stop because I was feeding the anxiety by doing that. After my husband died, I went through all kinds of weird emotions and had my share of panic on top of it all. It is not easy losing a spouse and having to face life all by ourselves. There were times when I thought I was dying even when I wasn't having a panic attack. Please be gentle with yourself and perhaps look for an online group for people who have lost a spouse. FFOS is a Yahoo group for loss due to suicide but there are people on there that have just lost someone through illness. You can email the moderator and ask for other groups because they do know of some. There was another grief group I was in but I can't think of the name right now...senior moment I guess. One breath at
a time, one step at a time and stop checking your emotional status. I found that sometimes a really good cry got rid of my anxiety.
I hope you have someone you can talk to that is close by if not I'm always around so feel free to write.
Leandra
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
have a panic attack is that it will pass
whether it passes quickly or slowly
depends whether I drop the idea of it
being dangerous or not.
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